Learning disabilities

On Monday I will be going to a preliminary appointment with a psychologist as the first step in having Mustang tested for learning disabilities.

I am by now convinced that she is, indeed, affected by learning disabilities. But we will need the psychological assessment to “prove” it. (Of course, I could be wrong, but I doubt it.)

In the past week or so I have done some more research into learning disabilities and their manifestations. The more I read, the more certain I am. So much of what I see is 100% Mustang. (Not all, but enough.)

She has experienced great difficulty in learning to read. Not uncommon, I know, but it is the nature and especially the persistence of her difficulties that has led to concern. While her reading has improved remarkably, and she can now read simple texts without assistance, she still has great difficulty in decoding new words, and in spelling.

On the other hand, she is a great talker. I remember last Christmas, we were reading Christmas stories and she wanted to tell the Christmas story. She proceeded to do so in great detail, right from the annunciation to the flight to Egypt! (I was duly impressed.)

Math has also been a challenge. Again, not uncommon, but again the degree and persistence of the challenge lead to concern.

On the other hand, she has great knowledge in many areas. Especially about animals (horses!!!), bugs, flowers, and so on. She loves being read to and remembers much of what is read to her. She also loves having stories told to her. (Most times, the instant we get into the car I hear “Mommy, can you tell a story?” She wants stories about animals with NO PEOPLE. And frequently animals having babies.) We also enjoy watching nature and other informational videos and she gains much knowledge from these. (I generally limit movie-watching to once a week but may make an exception for a learning video.)

Her marks in school reflect this. She does quite well in “knowledge” and creative areas (art, drama, social studies, science, health, phys ed) and less well in the academic areas (language and math). But as she moves forward in school, success in the “knowledge” areas is going to depend more and more on her capabilities in the academic areas, as the former begin to draw more heavily on reading and math skills.

Though Mustang generally enjoys school, she is definitely aware that other kids seem to catch on better and more easily than she does. And she is beginning to be more and more aware of some of the ways in which she finds it hard to control her behaviour (impulsivity). It is at time like this, when she expresses self-doubt, insecurity, and sorrow at having a brain that is “wired differently,” that my heart breaks.

My hope is that, if learning disabilities can be identified and accommodations put into place to enable her to succeed despite them, she will not become discouraged or disheartened at the academic challenges she faces. I want her to succeed in school and to enjoy school. And above all, I want her to succeed as a person and be happy, confident, and sure of her own worth and value.

So far, most of what I’ve found on-line relates to defining learning disabilities and their manifestations. I have yet to find much on how to deal with them. That’s what the psychologist’s report, hopefully, will help to identify: what different methods can be used in school and at home that will help Mustang to learn better.

I ask you to pray that this process will be fruitful, and that Mustang will learn to cope well with whatever challenges she faces.

Addenda
Definition of learning disabilities
Understanding learning disabilities
Some common signs of learning disabilities
Learning Disabilities Association of Canada

How our garden grows

This is what the garden looked like in mid-June, about a month after annuals were planted and two months after perennials started to poke up.

Ottawa Ethiopian Adoptive Families

When I started the process to adopt Button, there were only about 4 families in the region (about a 160km circumference) who were adopting from Ethiopia (that I knew of). Since then our group has grown by leaps and bounds; we’re now up to about 25 families! Back then I started organizing some get-togethers for the group. Our first was in April 2007 and consisted of me (with Mustang), Justice (who didn’t bring Wild Thing that first time), and a woman visiting from northern Alberta (who also had a Chinese daughter!).

In mid June we had another get-together and it was quite a different story! Justice was there (with Wild Thing this time!), Zia and her family attended, Mark & Mira with Summer’s photo in hand, Shane and Ashley with Isaiah’s photo in hand, Sandi’s gang, Allison and Mei Le (still waiting for a referral at the time), and Mona (also waiting for a referral at the time). I hope I haven't missed anybody.



I’m so pleased at how the connections are building in our group and we’re forming a little community. I’m also very pleased at the fact that there are several other ChinEthiAdian families being formed. Ours won’t be so different after all. (Well, it will, but certainly not unique, and we’ll have friends whose families look just like ours. Single mom and all.)

When everyone else had gone, my gang headed across the park to where another celebration of sorts was wrapping up. We got there in time to have faces painted and to snag a bunch of balloons that were being taken down.

Family Camp for Adoptive Families

Children’s Bridge, the agency I used to adopt Mustang, had its first ever family camp for adoptive families this spring, the first weekend in June. I thought it would be a good opportunity for both Mustang and Button to connect with other adopted kids (especially Mustang). As CB has only just started its Ethiopia adoption program, there weren’t any other kids from Ethiopia there (but there was someone from the Ethiopian community in Toronto). But there were lots of Asian kids – Chinese girls and both girls and boys from Korea and Vietnam.

We shared a cabin with three other families, including two Chinese girls about Mustang’s age or a bit older, and one boy from Vietnam, I think a year younger than Mustang.


The kids both spent some time catching frogs at the pond/lake/marsh near our cabin.





It was about a 3 to 4-hour drive to get to the camp, so I picked Mustang up from school at noon (she didn’t mind!) and we headed off. We made several stops along the way, one to run around a field and catch butterflies, and one for ice cream and “supper,” resulting in the whole trip taking close to six hours!!

The only downside to the weekend was that the mosquitoes and blackflies were horrendous. Even slathering Mustang with bug juice didn’t help much; she (our official bug-magnet) ended up with hundreds of bites around her ears and on her face and neck. Of course, she couldn’t stop scratching and everything got a bit infected and provoked some eczema, leaving her cheek very inflamed and sore and it took a full six weeks for everything to clear up. I started giving her some antihistamines to lessen the skin irritation and itch, and kept it up all summer since she is prone to bug bites and eczema. Just stopped a couple of weeks ago (mid-Sept) when most of the biting bugs had disappeared.

I'm back!

I certainly never meant this hiatus to last five months!!! But May was busy with birthdays and getting ready for our big summer trip, then June was busy with more holiday prep and actually leaving on the trip, July we were travelling (not that I couldn’t have updated on-the-road), August was busy with getting settled back home and back-to-school prep, September was busy with getting settled into school, trying to get as much done around the house as possible before going back to work, welcoming our Nanny, a visit from grandparents… And here we are in October already. A full nine months since Button joined the family. Yikes.

So, what’s happened in the last five months? (Other than being busy with all of the above...)

I’ll give you a few brief snapshots, with (appropriately!) pictures:

Animal rescue

Early in May Mustang noticed a sparrow on our street that wasn’t flying well. She was very concerned. When I went out it had made it to a neighbour’s second-storey window awning, so I thought it was okay. But then it fluttered down and flopped about on the road, showing it obviously wasn’t okay. So, using my Tilley hat, Mustang managed to capture the poor critter. We brought it inside and put it in a box with a bit of birdseed and water (and some soft blankets so it would be comfy).

Here is Ms. Sparrow in her box. (It turned out she had a wing infection.)

On Saturday we took it to the bird rescue centre in the southwest section of the city, in the middle of a large, undeveloped wooded area. It was a lovely day, so we took advantage of the opportunity to hike down one of the trails and saw many other wild creatures.

A Canada goose was enjoying the day as much as we were!

it took some doing to catch the bluejay in action. We would put a peanut on the railing by the lookout over the marsh, and he would swoop down, grab it, and fly off in one big blur. I tried following him with the camer, but he moved too fast. So I trained my camera on the peanut and waited, and waited. This was the result.

The squirrels loved the peanuts, too.

As did the chipmunks!

I think this was a turtle shell, sans turtle, lying on the rocks by the base of the marsh lookout.

Watersnake - this was a marshy area and Mr. Snake was quite happy slithering aobut in the water.

Of course, to watch a water snake you gotta get close...

To top it all off, just as we got back to the parking lot, three deer delighted us with their presence.

May is birthday month

Our friend A has her birthday on the 7th. Mustang’s is the 21st. Button’s is the 27th. Laolao’s is the 28th. A’s dad, P, has his on the 30th. So from the beginning of the month, it was birthday planning non-stop! Laolao and Laoye had gone home at the end of March, but they flew out for another visit to celebrate all the birthdays (especially as it was Button’s first Canadian birthday). They arrived on May 20th and stayed until the partying was done on June 5th, this time taking their car that had lived here since October 2006!

Mustang turns 8

This was the first year she had a birthday party with her school friends (and two church friends as well). Mustang really wanted a unicorn cake - and not just a picture of a unicorn, but shaped like a unicorn! So Mommy worked some magic, and this was the result. Not the most elegant-looking of cakes, but Mustang was very happy with it.

Button turns 5

We had a fairly small celebration with a few grown-up church friends and neighbourhood friends. (Actually we had two, with church friends and one with our neighbourhood dog-walking friends (see below).) Since Mustang had a cool cake, Button needed one too. He wanted a tiger, but I didn't have to cut out the tiger shape, so I just decorated it fiercely.





We might have gone a bit overboard with the presents, but it was his first birthday in Canada and he didn't have a lot of toys that were distinctly "his." And I hadn't yet spent any of the "welcome-home" money from friends. So anyhow...

Laolao turns 70

Aoout a week before Laolao and Laoye arrived, it occurred to me that Laolao was having a "milestone" birthday this year. I would have liked to organize a big bash, but didn't have energy or time. So contacted our good friend L and asked if she might host a "surprise" celebration. We did it as a lunch on Laolao's birthday, with lady friends she's made during her manye extended stays. About a dozen ladies came, and it was a nice surprise. And a nice end-of-May day for a lunch in the garden.

A turns 15, P turns 52, and D turns 18!!!

With a combined total of five birthdays in seven weeks (D’s is near the end of June), and a busy life with two teenage kids (them) and two little kids (us), and since they hadn't made it to Button's birthday celebration, we decided to have a “family” birthday party with prezzies for all (except the Moms and Laoye - we're the oddballs in the birthday schedule).

Big D and bigger D. (Used to be big D and little D... but that was ages ago!)

Walking dogs

Mustang yearns for a “real” pet. She plays with Calico on occasion, but being a guinea pig, Calico needs gentle play and isn’t particularly responsive. (She’s also rather timid- perhaps as a result of too vigourous play when we first got her? Or perhaps it’s just her nature.) Anyhow, Mustang would LOVE to have a dog. Of course, now that Button is around, he’d LOVE to have a dog too. Or a cat. Or a rabbit. Or a lizard…

Anyhow, after Mustang’s pleading one day in early May, I suggested she could try walking some of the neighbours’ dogs – get some experience, see if she really liked the dogs, get some exercise... “Sure!” she said, “who can we ask?”

There are certainly plenty of dogs in the neighbourhood. The trick is to find a person or family that doesn’t mind. Enter G and C. They live across the street, have three lovely Australian shepherd dogs, and – better yet – G is home much of the time, as he’s retired/on disability. And they like kids.

So I took Mustang and Button across the street and rang the bell. G answered, and we asked if they could walk the dogs. Of course, the dogs are a handful – small (well, medium-sized) but strong. Each of them probably weighs about the same as Button, and they’re low to the ground and powerful. So G gave each kid one dog and took one himself. I went, too, to see how things went.

Holly, at 12, is the oldest and also the gentlest. She was rescued from an illegal puppy mill and has lots of mother instinct. She doesn’t pull much at all, and tends to walk, not run. (She’s the one with the white ruff around her neck.)

Madison is 5 and is quite energetic. A beautiful golden colour, she loves to run, but doesn’t pull too too hard. At least, not compared to 3-year-old Nicky, the most rambunctious of the bunch. Nicky is constantly straining at the leash and wants to go fast, far, and furious.

For about two weeks Mustang and Button faithfully went and rang the bell almost every day after school to go walk the dogs. I was quite impressed! Then it diminished a bit, but not completely. Of course, we were gone most of the summer, and when we got back G&C were gone for a while. But now that school’s back in session, they’ve gone a few times for a dog-walking treat.

And in the process, we’ve made some new friends.

Odds and sods

When we hauled the bikes out in late March (as soon as the roads were clear of snow) I had put training wheels on Button’s bike. Within three weeks he had gotten his balance, learned to start and turn well, and didn’t need them anymore.

Look, Ma! No training wheels!

Spring is time to get out the bubble juice. A source of endless entertainment. Mustang still enjoys it, and so do I! We have a “millions of bubbles” gadget that does what it says – well, hundreds is more likely. But to a four-year-old, it sure seems like a hundred-million-thousand bubbles!!!

Well, if you can't get a real live bunny, a stuffy bunny will do. Welcome to Poppyseed...

On the last day of Tulip Festival, on the May long weekend, we went to the festival central and wandered around, taking in a few performances and enjoying an ice cream. But the highlight (for the kids at least) was riding this merry-go-round. They went two or three times!

There’s a nice garden just outside the city where they sell lots of herbs. We made a spring pilgrimage and, besides enjoying the garden, the kids had fun playing in the playground and just running around.